Time

It's a simple four letter word really - but SO complicated.

Time calms me, and fills me with dread.
Time can fly past so fast that you can almost feel the wind past your cheeks,
and it can feel so slow that you can see no end to this minute your standing in.

The beautiful orange glow of sunset lasts only a seconds but can make me stop & slow & breathe. deep. slow. How strange. As a child I would set off on my bike to play under the condition of "be home before dark" but then dark would arrive too soon and I'd find myself riding that little flower bike as fast as my legs could take me.

School days passed slowly and yet school holiday days flashed by. But then you'd go back to the first day of your new school year and it seemed that your peers had grown, changed and tanned. "Has it been that long?"

The time waiting for your new love to arrive at your door is excruciating but on the day that you wed the time will pass at such a speed that you will forever be grateful for the photographs that show you what you missed.

A 40 week pregnancy will feel like 95 but that baby will grow so fast that you will ask out loud for the world to spin slower and give you more time to adore every single amazing, perfect characteristic that that child posesses.

Questions need answers.

Decisions need to be made.

Is it the right time?

Is it too late?

Is it too soon?

I see wrinkles arrive and wobbly bits tease and yet I know so much more now than I did when all was taut and slim that I wouldn't go back. Well ... maybe just 10 years or so.

My day is 24 hours long.

Five of those at work - they go slow.

Seven or so for sleep - never enough.

The other twelve are spent running around for children, cooking, cleaning, shopping (not the fun kind), homework helping, and did I say running around for children?!

Those 12 hours are way too short.

I try hard to fit play, love and 'me time' into those 12 remaining hours but I must admit that it is there that I fail.

I need more time.